Dubai Underground Opens! Assistant Fails to Capture the Moment.

LTS Assistant Leia can print pricelists and press releases with margins meticulously even. She can plate ritz crackers in an attractive semi-circle for openings. She can enfold oil paintings in the gentle embrace of bubble wrap, and securely affix sticky-labels to walls and postcards alike.

What Assistant Leia cannot do is take a digital photograph that is in any way legible or compositionally appealing. Fuzzy blobs hover in front of what may or may not be art. Darkness reigns over crowds with orangely glowing eyes. Heads are excised with abandon.

So, I wanted to write this gorgeously illustrated blog post about how awesome last night's opening was. Instead, I'm forced to give you this:

Just to clear things up, this was an opening at an art gallery. There were beautiful photographs and prints. Pretend that there's art in this photo, and that people are looking at said art rather than staring somberly en masse at a blank wall. How I managed to capture an exact moment where EVERY SINGLE ART PIECE would be blocked by a body is a mystery of physics.


This is supposed to be a picture of a good-looking couple admiring one of Khalid's prints, but it's mostly a picture of an empty doorway.


On the plus side, this picture has both people and art. Yay me! On the downside, it looks like one of those night-vision nature documentaries about the habits of unsettling nocturnal predators.


I'm proud of this one.

Make sure to RSVP to our upcoming artist dinner, Du-Licious! You'll be happy to hear that assistant Leia will be serving hors d'oeuvres, while a more qualified intern operates the camera. It's not like I've been demoted, really. Marisa says that she wants to DIRECT my skills to where they'll be more useful. If I do okay, she says she'll think about letting me pour wine (white only)! Wish me luck!

Valentine's kisses!

LTS.A.L.